How to Take Control of Your Subconscious Mind (Instead of Letting It Sabotage Your Efforts)

You meditate. You read the books. You repeat the affirmations. And yet, you still feel stuck. Maybe it shows up as procrastination, perfectionism, or self-sabotage. Maybe you freeze in moments when you most want to speak up or shine.

If you believe you are doing "all the right things" but still can’t seem to break through that invisible ceiling, this might be the real reason: Your subconscious mind is quietly running the show.

And until you learn how to work with it (not against it), no amount of logic, willpower, or goal setting will give you the lasting change you’re crave.

I this blog post, I'll talk about what the subconscious mind really is, how it gets trained, and how it can be in charge of your life more than you realise. I will also tell you about four powerful methods that I use with clients every day to help them change those deep-seated patterns and eventually feel more calm, confident, and in charge, unique subconscious mind secret activators like hypnosis and breathwork.

What Is the Subconscious Mind, Really?

You’ve probably heard that 'your subconscious shapes your reality', but what does that actually mean in your everyday life?

It's not just a buzzword or a smart idea. Think of your subconscious mind like your inner autopilot; it runs 95% of your ideas, habits, and behaviours without you ever knowing it. While your conscious mind is busy making decisions and building to-do lists, your subconscious mind is busy pulling the strings behind the scenes, depending on previous beliefs, emotional memories, and patterns you learnt often when you were a child.

The subconscious is like the operating system beneath your apps. You can keep updating the surface, but unless the core code is reprogrammed, it will always default to what it knows.

Why 95% of Your Daily Actions Are Subconscious

Every time you drive a car, brush your teeth, or second-guess yourself in a meeting, you’re operating from your subconscious. That’s because it’s efficient. It doesn’t need to re-learn how to respond every time.

But when it stores limiting beliefs like “I’m not enough”, “Success comes with a price”, “If I am seen, I’ll be judged” ... your subconscious starts running your life through fear instead of possibility.

The subconscious learns through repetition + emotion. That’s why childhood messages become lifelong beliefs. Your brain wires together emotional experiences with mental interpretations, and it holds onto them tightly until you teach it something new.

If you want to explore the science behind it in more detail, read my blog posts "Learn more about how the subconscious influences your decision-making" and "Uncovering the Science of Clinical Hypnosis".

5 Clear Signs Your Subconscious Is In the Driver’s Seat

You don’t need to be a neuroscientist to recognise the signs. If your subconscious is running the show, you may notice:

1. You keep repeating the same patterns (even when you know better)

2. You freeze or avoid taking action despite being ambitious

3. Your inner critic is louder than your confidence

4. You feel blocked or anxious when it’s time to be visible or ask for more

5. You self-sabotage just when things are going well

Sound familiar? You’re running on old programming. You don't need fixing, you need a mindset upgrade.

Where Do These Subconscious Beliefs Come From?

Your subconscious is like a sponge in early childhood. From birth to around age 7, your brain is in a highly suggestible state absorbing beliefs from your environment.

Childhood Conditioning

If love came with conditions, you might now equate achievement with worth.

If emotions were dismissed, you might now disconnect from your intuition.

Cultural & Generational Messaging

"Don’t be too loud. Don’t be too sensitive. Don’t take up space."

These ideas become internalised, even if they don’t serve you as an adult.

Want to explore this deeper? Read my blog post: Why You Keep Playing Small

The Impact of Unconscious Programming on Your Life

When your subconscious is wired for fear, lack, or shame, the ripple effect shows up in every corner of your life not just in your self-esteem. It quietly defines how you see yourself, what you believe you’re allowed to want, and how you expect others to treat you.

Let’s look into it in more detail.

Relationships: Do you notice yourself frequently people-pleasing, over-apologising, or feeling anxious if someone pulls away? This isn't a personality trait, it’s often the result of subconscious beliefs about worthiness and love. If as a child you learned that love must be earned, or that conflict isn’t safe, your attachment style will reflect that.

Money & Success: Struggling to raise your rates or ask for what you're worth?That’s not just a confidence problem, it’s a subconscious value problem. If you believe success is selfish, or that you’re “not good enough,” you’ll keep playing small without even fully realising it.

Career Growth: Ever stopped yourself from applying for a better job just because you didn’t check every box on the job description? Or stayed quiet in meetings even when you had a valuable perspective or strongly disagreed? That’s your subconscious pulling the brakes. Many career-driven women carry an ingrained belief: “Don’t speak unless you’re certain. Don’t step forward unless you’re 100% ready.” But that hesitation isn’t about capability, it’s about subconscious programming. Your mind is trying to protect you from rejection, embarrassment, or judgment. But in doing so, it can keep you stuck playing small.

Leadership: Avoiding visibility, micromanaging your team, or second-guessing every decision?These patterns often stem from deeper fears, like being seen and not measuring up, or losing control. Your subconscious isn’t sabotaging you it’s trying to protect you. But protection isn’t the same as progress.

Logic Doesn’t Change Emotion

Have you ever told yourself, "I know I should feel confident, but I just don't?" That’s because your subconscious isn’t convinced. Real change happens when your body and subconscious feel safe to believe something new.

That’s where the nervous system and tools like hypnotherapy + breathwork come in. You can learn more about this in my blog How to Stop Overthinking: Break Free from Your Mind’s Endless Loop.

How to Start Rewiring Your Subconscious Mind

Change happens when you know about it and feel safe to change. You can't change anything if you don't know about it. But just being aware isn't enough. To let go of old ideas and make new ones that give you strength, you also need to feel safe in your body, mind, and heart.

Awareness + Safety = Change

That's why I always start with making your nervous system safe before we start rewiring your subconscious.

These are four strong tools that I utilise with my clients every day:

1. Hypnotherapy: Go Beyond Mindset

Hypnotherapy lets you go right to the source: your subconscious mind. It's not merely a matter of having different thoughts. It's about finding the belief that is holding you back, letting it go, and replacing it with one that helps you grow. You can find out the hidden story behind your habits; change the way you talk to yourself that keeps you stuck; set new beliefs that fit with the person you are becoming.

This is what makes the top Sydney Hypnotherapy different from the others if you're looking for something more than just quick fixes. You may see my full list of services here, which includes hypnotherapy, breathwork, and coaching that is designed to help you make big changes in your life.

2. Breathwork: Reset the Fight-or-Flight Response

Your breath is like a remote for your body. It's the quickest way to relax your nervous system and make room for new empowering beliefs.

Try this:

Inhale for 4

Hold for 2

Exhale for 6

Do it again for two minutes.

You’ll feel more grounded, present, and safe, which is the first step towards actual change.

3. Affirmations That Work

Affirmations only work when they land. I teach my clients how to pair words with emotion, breath and visualisation.

For example, affirmation: “I am safe to be seen.” Say it slowly. Breathe it in. Find where you feel it most in your body. Put your hand on that place and take 3 deep slow breaths gently repeating affirmation in your mind.

4. Repetition in a Controlled State

Your nervous system is the gateway to lasting change. Repeating new beliefs when you're calm, like during breathwork or after hypnosis, helps lock in new neural pathways.

Want to dive deeper into the science? Here’s a great study on subconscious reprogramming and neuroplasticity.

Ready to Shift from Survival Patterns to Conscious Power?

Here’s what happens when you stop letting your subconscious run the show:

You say what you mean without overthinking it;

You follow through without burning out'

You lead, love, and live from a place of grounded confidence.

This isn’t about becoming a "new" version of you. It’s about returning to the real you before the world told you who you had to be.

My clients tell me:

"I didn’t expect to feel this calm so quickly. I finally trust myself." "I stopped playing small. I led the meeting like I belonged there."

And you can, too.

Here’s the truth: You’re not stuck because you’re broken. You’re stuck because your inner programming is outdated—and that’s something you can absolutely change.

Whether your challenge is confidence, anxiety, or visibility, the real transformation begins with getting beneath the surface. Your subconscious holds the key. And with the right tools, support, and intention—you can reclaim your power.

You don’t need to do this alone. Book your free subconscious clarity session. Let’s explore how to break the old patterns and step into the real you.

You Are Not Your Patterns—You Are the Conscious Creator of Your Life

The subconscious mind is powerful. But you are more powerful. You have the ability to change your inner blueprint and create a life, business, or leadership style that reflects the truth of who you are.

The first step? Decide to take back the driver’s seat today.